As you’ve settled into your new home have you found your happy place?(asks a professional coach for expat women)

A wooden chair sits in a flooded Venetian doorway, offering a view of a gondola gliding through the canal.

If I asked you about a happy place in your new city, what would you say?

People often become attached to places connected with warm memories and feelings of nostalgia.  It’s often a place associated with positive emotions like joy, hope, and happiness.

For lots of us, it’s a place where we feel carefree, relaxed, and away from the hassles of life, doing things we love.

For many, the happy place is remembered, a place from an earlier time, a vacation place, or another place from their past.

But as I’ve moved around to different places over the years, I’ve learned that my happy place doesn’t need to be associated with a nostalgic and wistful yearning for things and places from times past.

Wherever you go you can find a happy place.

How?

If you are present enough to notice the spaces and places that make you feel safe, at ease, calm you might notice that simply returning to those places creates a felt sensation of peace and relaxation.

The key here is presence – which is just being purposefully attentive to the atmosphere, environment and things around you.

For me,

• a certain bookstore brings peace, calm and focus as I scan the shelves and flick through something that interests me  

• an old local bar at a particular time of time of day when the ambiance is quiet and the staff are unhurried, helps me process the day

• a park where the sunset is spectacular never fails to inspire awe

• a corner of my house with a comfortable chair and a table at the right height for my coffee cup can bring relaxation

• a bike track that runs next to a river shaded by trees where the birds gather in the cool reminds me why nature is important

And yet if you were to visit any of these places, none of this may be present for you.

... which brings me to another key point here

The happy place is intensely personal – only sometimes is the happy effect shared by one or two others and very rarely by a group of people.

Being intentional about noticing and building a cluster of your happy places in your new city is part of the mindset shift that helps to build attachment to a place – a sense of home.

As a professional coach working with expat women, I'm often asked:

‘How can I make this place home?’

Perhaps, being purposeful about noticing where and when you experience small moments of calm, joy, awe, happiness could be a starting point.

To test the theory, notice these feelings and return to these places and see what happens.

If you're still looking to find 'home' in your new place book a call to chat.

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