When you go home for the holidays what will you tell them about your life away? (A question from a professional coach for expat women)
- LynneM
- Nov 10
- 2 min read
So you’ve been away living and working abroad …
You’ve been away all year living and working in another country with all the things that means:
New language
New social setting
New routines
New job
You’re about a year into this adventure and, while there have been some amazing experiences …
Summer in Greece, hiking in the Dolomites, city breaks in Milan/Brussels etc.
… a lot of it is the day-in day-out of working life – just relocated and in a way that brings challenges you never imagined.
When you reconnect with friends and family it could be crickets (because no-one cares) or
‘Oh my gosh – that must be so exciting! ‘But is it??
‘Tell me all about life in paris/rome/madrid/singapore/doha…
How has that been??’
Do you:
Overplay the adventure (<50%) and downplay the everyday challenges (>50%) of living abroad
Outright lie – ‘it’s fabulous and everything is wonderful – never a dull moment!’
Tell the truth – there are some things to love but a lot of the time:
I'm trying to figure out things that should be simple but aren’t
I’m lonely – I have work colleagues and some acquaintances but haven’t made any real friends
I’m exhausted from working in a new role in a new place without family and friends
Regardless of your decision to share it or not the reality you live with remains the same.
Which is why what you tell family and friends matters less than what you tell yourself about the next phase of your life abroad.
The responses that matter most are the responses to the questions you ask yourself:
Why is this so hard?
How can I find real friends?How long am I really staying?
Was this the right choice?
And the big one:
Should I stay or should I go?
These are the conversations that you really want to have but maybe can’t find anyone who’ll:
Listen with no agenda
Help you remember why this mattered
Help you organise your thoughts
Support your decision-making about your ‘absolutely yes’ and ‘absolutely no’ options
Help you to take some steps towards getting the answers that feel right for you
These are the conversations you can have with a professional coach for expat women.
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